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My Life as a Time Traveler…

I know its a bit of an odd title, but I will do my best to explain. Have you ever worried about something in your not so distant future?

For example: a family reunion, the outcome of a job interview, going to the shops to get a pint of milk!

I know I have, (and I still do with alarming regularity) what really gets me is that I often take it way to far and end up deciding that I know what will happen, even though it hasn’t happened yet. For an example I will tell you about something that happened to me not to long ago. I hadn’t spoken or spent any time with my brother for quite some time. This had nothing to do with him, it was my fault. I had been far to busy drinking my life away and feeling sorry for myself. I was naturally apprehensive about meeting my brother again. How would he respond to me? After all, he had witnessed my failed attempts at recovery and the resulting emotional trauma to my family first hand. The night before we met my mind was in overdrive. I guess that I had just been in denial about the whole thing up until then. I had decided that It was not going to work out, we at best would be frosty towards each other and at worst we may end up having a huge argument.

Why had I decided that this was the only way that it would turn out? Was it because of past experience? Has everything like this turned out bad in the past? well not to put to finer point on it…NO! Knowing all these things still didn’t stop me from assuming the worse would happen.Was it paranoia? I don’t know. But I can’t help but think that I had wasted a lot of time and lost a lot of sleep over what turned out to be a great reunion.

I really don’t have any answers for fellow Time Travelers. I’ve found a method that sometimes works for me, so I will mention it here (It may help you). Imagine these negative thoughts in your mind as a train coming into a station (the train represents the thought), you have decided not to get on the train, yet the train still slows. You watch the train as it passes, and you acknowledge that it is there, but you do nothing else you just let the train pass by, and then it has moved on, and if I concentrate enough so will I have. The thought will have slipped by. I may file it under the “Interesting but not relevant now” but the thought would have been dealt with.

Food for thought though!

Well it’s just gone midnight and my backup has completed on my server, so I think I will call it a day and hit the sack.

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